I’ve always been one that plans out the future. I love being sure of things. . .but sometimes for just a moment, I’m not. I’m talking about exactly where I’ll be in five months. Everyone knows I want to be in the mountains of Colorado, and that I’ll be graduating soon but I don’t know exactly what I’ll be doing. I’m getting use to holding onto my faith. Faith is key here and it has been quite the lovely and bumpy road with God.
But there’s one thing I am sure of and that’s Hope. I remember writing about her as one of my first ‘blog’ entries I ever did, and it seems from those nine months ago that my heart has just grown more and more for her. Before I went to sleep last night, I was feeling so much love just thinking about the first time I’ll hold her little hand or the first time I’ll get to carry her when they place her in my arms. I’ve already had dreams of this little girl in my arms and it feels so surreal. I know God has been giving me dreams of that moment because He’s telling me to hold on and to remember that feeling because it will happen one day. I thank God for blessing me with the life that I have: the shelter, food, college, the unconditional love from my family and close friends. I thank God for at least giving me direction after graduation and what I’ll be looking into next semester for a career. I thank God for placing the heart of adoption in me with passion and fuel. I thank God for self-control at my age, and the wisdom to know good from evil. I thank God for loving me. . .and sending His son to die on the cross for me. These are just some of my late night thankful thoughts.
I’m praying for you, Hope.